WifeAdvice.com

Don’t make junior cry

Ever open a present and wonder what possessed the person who bought it to actually wrap and deliver it? I’m sure many of us husbands have been guilty of this in the past.

Does the following sound familiar? It’s last minute and you decide to grab something off the shelf just so you can say you had a present under the tree. “At least she can open something on Christmas. She can always return it.” This approach has worked with moderate success in the past, but wives are catching on. They don’t want just anything. They want thought. They want planning. And now, they want us to make the return for the poorly chosen gift. What will we do? Luckily the other day I had a flash of inspiration that will help you next year. It’s based on an experience I had last week.

My friend told me he bought his wife a jewelry box for Christmas. He had noticed that his wife’s box was falling apart. I guess this guy was going for husband of the year award or something. Anyway, he went to some fancy place and got conned by the saleswoman to purchase a jewelry box for $40. When he showed me the box I almost died. It was clear with bright, colorful circles all over it. It looked like something a little girl would keep her My Little Pony toys in. He decided to show the box to a girl at work for a second opinion. She also laughed and said it looked like it belonged to a third grader. He was panicked because it was two days before Christmas and he did not have time to return the item.

I asked how this could have happened. He mentioned that he and his son were in the shop and saw this one and picked it out. “Wait a minute,” I said. “Your son was with you?” He said yes.

“Problem solved,” I exclaimed. “Just tell her that your son picked it out. Tell her that you had seen another one that was better for a mature woman, but you couldn’t deny your son the opportunity to participate in his own mother’s Christmas present. Do you think she can actually complain knowing that you thoughtfully planned to include your children? Of course you need to make sure your son is present when she opens it. You won’t be bringing any gifts back this year – that box is a keeper!”

He asked, “Do you think she will buy it?”

“Of course she will. How could she not?”

He asked several women at work if they would fall for the story and they all said they would. The men he asked applauded the idea and pronounced it as a true Christmas miracle. I got a text on Christmas morning from him that simply said, “Your idea worked.”

Another satisfied customer. Feel free to use this for anniversaries, holidays, and of course birthdays. I’m not sure how far one could take this, but I think next year I will try this approach and get my wife some soda for my office. “Sorry, the kids really thought you would want the soda so you would have something for me.”