Can You Go To Work For Me Today?
Another advancement for mankind
Once in a while the heavens are opened and one of life’s secrets is placed into the trusting care of man. These secrets have provided untold advancement for our world. Examples permeate throughout time: Galileo, Newton, Alexander Fleming, and Einstein to name a few. I wish to inform the world that I have been blessed with such a secret and I am delighted to share it with husbands out there who have struggled to find an answer to your wives’ most challenging question: I’m sick. Can you stay home tomorrow?
You are placed in an impossible situation. You can either: 1) stay home from work, get behind on your projects, and forgo a promotion; or 2) go to work and feel the wrath of your wife as you deflect text messages, instant messages, email, and phone calls throughout the day.
The realization I recently had is that both options are possible for most husbands with stay-at-home wives. But let’s turn the tables for a moment. What if you get sick? Are both options available to your wife? Wait for it … You should have just recognized the pure genius behind this question. Generally, wives cannot go to work and do our jobs but we can do their jobs. This is unbalanced. We need to save our sick days for times when we are critically injured by a madman or harpoon. Next time your wife asks if you can stay home to do her job simply say, “Sure. I just need you to do my job next time I get sick.” Her bewildered look will be enough to let you know that you can get back to what you were doing as she realizes that you have made a monumental point.
I recognize that this does not apply when both parents are working, but this is gold for those of you who have a wife at home. I know the Nobel Peace Prize was recently handed out, but I’m hoping for write-in votes next year.
Oh, before I forget. I don’t want anyone to think that women don’t receive the same insights that change the world. Just look at Marion Donovan and Sybil Geeslin (Kennedy). These two women made serious advancements by proposing options to move from cloth diapers to disposable ones. Amazing!
5 Responses to “Can You Go To Work For Me Today?”
I tell Kurt all the time that I’d love to switch him places once in a while. Sorry, Donkey – doesn’t work in all situations! Your job at the office is WAY easier…
By Sher on Oct 11, 2009
It was with much enthusiam that I shared this post with my version of “The Wife.” After reading the post she declared that when she is sick she just needs me to stay and take care of her and she quickly added she would do the same for me if I were sick. Thus our mutual need for care canceled out any imbalance. Thus, a brilliantly contructed argument fizzled instantly. I do try to pick my battles and this was not worth one so I let it pass.
Oh well… I want to give a shout out to Mrs. Ruth Wakefield, who in the 1930’s, invented the chocolate chip cookie. Nice job Mrs. Wakefield; you were one smart cookie!
By karlmalone on Oct 11, 2009
Unfortunately, your secret still doesn’t fly…when you get sick you have the option of taking the day off and you get taken care of. When “the wife gets sick she still has to do her job and nobody takes care of her.
By Mandy on Oct 13, 2009
Donkey- I hope your likeness is bronzed and put on display for the world to laud your brilliance. Ladies you are missing the genius here. the donkey is not comparing job difficulty or who is taken care of when ill. he is simply addressing his need to reserve his sick time for when he can not be spreading illness at work. think of the pandemic mayhem that would exist if sick workers all over the world had to go to work because they used up all their sick time (which is usually only 3-5 days) for family illness.
By phillyz on Oct 14, 2009
Another way your argument doesn’t work is this simple fact: You can NOT have a baby therefore there is NO way you could ever do our “job”, so no prize for you donkey!
By Kairy on Oct 14, 2009