Shaving Your Child’s Head Is Not A Unilateral Decision
Lesson 30: The bald and the beautiful
Having hair is the bane of my existence. I hate having hair because I have to shower regularly, I have to pay to get it cut, and it makes me itchy. I recently shaved my head again since it is starting to get warmer and I love it. I try to push head-shaving on everyone. Unfortunately I discovered last week that there are bounds on who I can push my agenda on.
Lesson 30: Don’t shave your kid’s head unless you get approval from your wife
My wife was at the gym the other morning, and I was laying in bed when my kids jumped on me. I noticed how long their hair was and remembered that my wife tasked me with getting them haircuts that day. Several of my kids have heads that are not conducive to a bald look, but my two-year-old (Dimples) has a pretty good shaped head. An impulse went through my mind and I tried to suppress it, but I was taken over by the desire to recruit a fellow skinhead. I grabbed the clippers and began shaving my son’s head. I developed a justification just in case my wife got mad when she saw what I did. I would say, “It was all an accident. I was just trying to practice giving him a haircut and things didn’t go well, so I was forced to shave his head.”
You should be able to fill in the blanks from there based on the fact that you are reading this. Anger, frustration, and sadness are just some of the emotions that my wife experienced when she saw his hair. I provided my justification and explained that we would now be saving $5 a month since my son no longer needed a haircut. These points were disregarded by my wife and I spent the next few hours on the hot seat.
My suggestion: If you really want to shave your kids head, but don’t want to take the blame, do this: Bring your kid to the haircutters. Stand next to the barber as he cuts your kid’s hair. Pretend that you are pointing to a spot on your kid’s head and “accidentally” bump the barber’s hand as he is making a crucial cut or shave. The barber will be forced to shave the rest of the head and you can place the blame on someone else when you report back to your wife.
