Marriage Advice: Should Wives be Forced to Taste Sour Milk For the Family?

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Here’s where we answer our readers’ questions. Please don’t blame us if our suggestions don’t work for you–you’re the one taking advice from a Donkey.

Dear Donkey and Wife:

My husband and I came home from a long trip and we had some milk in the fridge we weren’t sure about…we all know how men can be– i was the one to test whether it was spoiled or not. What i am wondering is, who should test to see if the milk is spoiled?

-Sour Sport

He Says

My first inclination is to suggest having your kids or the family pets test out the milk. Why should the parents get sick? But this scenario is similar to many others: Who should check out a weird noise from the basement? Who should stick their arm into the garbage disposal? Who should lick a spoon out of the dishwasher to check if the dishes were cleaned? These and many other situations require someone who is willing to sacrifice for the good of the family. It seems obvious that this hero should be none other than the wife. Here’s why:
  • The husband is often a major source of income. You don’t want to lose the breadwinner to some spoiled milk or a wacky garbage disposal that gnaws off his arm while he is looking for a miniature fork.
  • Husbands have a knack for covering up tasteless/bad food with salt and sugar to make it go down. How many of us have been subjected to a bad dinner? You gotta force it down so your wife won’t get offended. There is no doubt that your husband will dump a little chocolate powder into the milk if it tastes sour. When you ask, “Is the milk sour,” he will respond, “Tastes great with some Nesquick.”
  • Women are more nurturing by nature. It would make sense to play to your strength and sacrifice one for the team. Why waste the energy forcing your husband to be something he is not? His skill is probably sleeping, so let him have a few extra winks while you go down to the basement to find out what the noise is and why there is a broken window.
  • Finally, I believe that there is a biological reason too. Women produce milk. They are more equipped to distinguish between milk that is good and milk that is sour. A man does not possess the glands or hormones to produce milk and might not have the chemical makeup to make the distinction.

She Says

Does anyone really need to taste the sour milk? I’m willing to take a sniff, but if The Donkey tried to get me to test it by drinking, I would just throw the milk out and get a new gallon. If he tried to make me stick my arm down the garbage disposal, I would just say the mini-fork was a loss, and go out and buy a new disposal and a new silverware set. Instead of chasing down strange noises in the night, I would just stop saying NO to the salesman that comes to my door every month and finally get an alarm system installed.

Do you see where I’m going with this? As long as I refuse the task, and find an alternative that involves spending more money, my “frugal” (cheapskate) husband will give in and save the money from being spent. Problem solved.

Any other advice for Sour Sport?

Read more in: Need Advice?
by The Donkey and The Wife
June 5, 2008

  1. 9 Responses to “Marriage Advice: Should Wives be Forced to Taste Sour Milk For the Family?”

  2. I can tell milk is sour just by sniffing.

    Before we were married, my husband drank some milk from my refrigerator that had gone bad. He raced to the sink to spit it out and has never trusted milk since! If it’s past the date, he won’t touch it. Little did I know I had solved such an important problem the “easy” way I should say, easy for me–he seemed to think I was trying to kill him!

    By Jane on Jun 5, 2008

  3. “When in doubt, throw it out”…and then the donkey should run to the store for more.

    Linda~

    By Linda~ on Jun 5, 2008

  4. It’s easy in our house…whoever drinks it and I don’t drink milk so he does the sniffing and tasting of it.

    By Shannon on Jun 5, 2008

  5. Part of my job in college was sniffing and tasting milk to see if it had gone bad. You always sniff first, and you only taste a little bit. Don’t just chug it! :)

    By MInTheGap on Jun 6, 2008

  6. the wife is brilliant!!

    By bella on Jun 8, 2008

  7. He does have a point about women producing milk. I’ve never met a male Lactation Consultant. I’m just saying.

    By Mr. Mustachio on Jun 9, 2008

  8. Who actually goes away for that long and leaves milk in the fridge? The question should be, “who’s job is it to clean out the fridge before you leave?”

    By wifelikeme on Jun 12, 2008

  9. way to go Wife, using the Donkey’s weaknesses to your advantage!

    By Karen on Jun 18, 2008

  10. There’s a date on the carton! If you’re not willing to run the risk of drinking a little sour milk, just throw it out.

    I agree with “wifelikeme”. When my family goes on vacation, there’s nothing left in the fridge that could possibly go bad before we get back.

    By Dameon on Aug 6, 2008

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