Comments on: Wife Doesn’t Want Husband Asking for Permission to Go Out… Or Does She? http://www.wifeadvice.com/2008/02/wife-doesnt-want-husband-asking-for-permission-to-go-out-or-does-she/ Funny marriage stories from a clueless husband and his patient wife Fri, 10 Sep 2010 04:38:24 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: WifeAdvice.com - funny marriage stories from a clueless husband and his patient wife » Blog Archive » Marriage Advice: When your wife says, “You won’t be in trouble.” http://www.wifeadvice.com/2008/02/wife-doesnt-want-husband-asking-for-permission-to-go-out-or-does-she/comment-page-1/#comment-2038 WifeAdvice.com - funny marriage stories from a clueless husband and his patient wife » Blog Archive » Marriage Advice: When your wife says, “You won’t be in trouble.” Thu, 01 May 2008 22:14:47 +0000 http://www.wifeadvice.com/2008/02/wife-doesnt-want-husband-asking-for-permission-to-go-out-or-does-she/#comment-2038 [...] Posts: Mother May I Read more in: From The Donkey by The Donkey May 1, [...] [...] Posts: Mother May I Read more in: From The Donkey by The Donkey May 1, [...]

]]> By: heather http://www.wifeadvice.com/2008/02/wife-doesnt-want-husband-asking-for-permission-to-go-out-or-does-she/comment-page-1/#comment-1613 heather Thu, 21 Feb 2008 14:11:43 +0000 http://www.wifeadvice.com/2008/02/wife-doesnt-want-husband-asking-for-permission-to-go-out-or-does-she/#comment-1613 I often get this question except phrased a little differently...as in "I already said probably but that I'd have to ask you first." Usually this applies to golf, which we all know means an entire DAY. I say we take the mental scoreboard out of our heads and put up a dry erase board on the fridge because I know he secretly thinks, "Well she was at the gym for an hour, which means I should be able to get permission to go watch NASCAR tomorrow." I often get this question except phrased a little differently…as in “I already said probably but that I’d have to ask you first.” Usually this applies to golf, which we all know means an entire DAY.

I say we take the mental scoreboard out of our heads and put up a dry erase board on the fridge because I know he secretly thinks, “Well she was at the gym for an hour, which means I should be able to get permission to go watch NASCAR tomorrow.”

]]> By: Dima http://www.wifeadvice.com/2008/02/wife-doesnt-want-husband-asking-for-permission-to-go-out-or-does-she/comment-page-1/#comment-1584 Dima Sat, 16 Feb 2008 00:43:02 +0000 http://www.wifeadvice.com/2008/02/wife-doesnt-want-husband-asking-for-permission-to-go-out-or-does-she/#comment-1584 i love this website allready.. ok, its quite simple.. the donkey should be a MAN about it and decide what hes doing, dont ASK FOR PERMISSION. say(or offer, or suggest.. whatever semantics you wish to use) what your going to do based on your own values and priorities and if your wife has a problem with it shel tell you. As a man your job is to MAKE DECISIONS, no one said you always had to be right about them.. if you overlooked something that made going out with your brother a bad idea. Your wife will let you know, otherwise, with all due respect. grow a pair. Your wife is saying she doesnt like controlling you! do what makes her happy, dont be a wuss. i love this website allready..
ok, its quite simple.. the donkey should be a MAN about it and decide what hes doing, dont ASK FOR PERMISSION. say(or offer, or suggest.. whatever semantics you wish to use) what your going to do based on your own values and priorities and if your wife has a problem with it shel tell you.

As a man your job is to MAKE DECISIONS, no one said you always had to be right about them.. if you overlooked something that made going out with your brother a bad idea. Your wife will let you know, otherwise, with all due respect. grow a pair. Your wife is saying she doesnt like controlling you! do what makes her happy, dont be a wuss.

]]> By: Slack http://www.wifeadvice.com/2008/02/wife-doesnt-want-husband-asking-for-permission-to-go-out-or-does-she/comment-page-1/#comment-1580 Slack Fri, 15 Feb 2008 18:48:47 +0000 http://www.wifeadvice.com/2008/02/wife-doesnt-want-husband-asking-for-permission-to-go-out-or-does-she/#comment-1580 OMG. I'm gonna get so hooked on this blog... I have found myself in this situation too, and I think Caterwagon has the best bead on the issue... As individuals, we should be able to decide we are going to do X, Y, or Z. I shouldn't have to ask permission to go out with the boys, and she shouldn't have to for a girls night. That said, Donkey, leave the jabs out of it. Don't "ask for permission". Quit being a retard. Ask if she has a problem with you going out tonight or the next or whatever. And, the ball & chain (hey, it's your logo), should not be a jerkface and get mad at the donkey for not reading her mind when he does go out. If you would rather him stick around tonight or whatever, SAY IT. And don't give that oh-so-delightful "you should know better" sneer that we all love. :) My 2 cents. :) OMG. I’m gonna get so hooked on this blog… I have found myself in this situation too, and I think Caterwagon has the best bead on the issue… As individuals, we should be able to decide we are going to do X, Y, or Z. I shouldn’t have to ask permission to go out with the boys, and she shouldn’t have to for a girls night.

That said, Donkey, leave the jabs out of it. Don’t “ask for permission”. Quit being a retard. Ask if she has a problem with you going out tonight or the next or whatever.

And, the ball & chain (hey, it’s your logo), should not be a jerkface and get mad at the donkey for not reading her mind when he does go out. If you would rather him stick around tonight or whatever, SAY IT. And don’t give that oh-so-delightful “you should know better” sneer that we all love. :)

My 2 cents. :)

]]> By: Carterwagon http://www.wifeadvice.com/2008/02/wife-doesnt-want-husband-asking-for-permission-to-go-out-or-does-she/comment-page-1/#comment-1547 Carterwagon Thu, 14 Feb 2008 16:47:29 +0000 http://www.wifeadvice.com/2008/02/wife-doesnt-want-husband-asking-for-permission-to-go-out-or-does-she/#comment-1547 If he asks like that, I answer him like that. it works in our home. My husband knows that I usually know what is coming up and if he is free or not, if I want him to stay home, i tell him. I learned a long time ago that I can't get mad at him for not WANTING to stay around ALL THE TIME. I can't get mad at him for not feeling or thinking the way I do. If it bothers me, I would ask "Will you stay with me tonight instead?"...it usually works out for the best. If he asks like that, I answer him like that. it works in our home. My husband knows that I usually know what is coming up and if he is free or not, if I want him to stay home, i tell him. I learned a long time ago that I can’t get mad at him for not WANTING to stay around ALL THE TIME. I can’t get mad at him for not feeling or thinking the way I do. If it bothers me, I would ask “Will you stay with me tonight instead?”…it usually works out for the best.

]]> By: celine http://www.wifeadvice.com/2008/02/wife-doesnt-want-husband-asking-for-permission-to-go-out-or-does-she/comment-page-1/#comment-1493 celine Wed, 13 Feb 2008 07:22:56 +0000 http://www.wifeadvice.com/2008/02/wife-doesnt-want-husband-asking-for-permission-to-go-out-or-does-she/#comment-1493 isn't this what is called talking to one another? the words we choose are important, but usually we don't have time to think deeply about them. but that doesn't mean we shouldn't reflect on past discussions and then change future ones. i find myself telling my husband when i am going to the bathroom and he makes fun of me for giving him such detailed information about my goings on, but sometimes it is important so we both know only one of us is around to "keep an eye" on the two year old. i think we should always notify each other of what is going on in a questioning way -- not overtly asking for permission though, but also not telling the other what we are doing (both rude). i think the donkey has unknowingly (or knowingly) concocted a method of making the wife feel like she is evil and should not be the ball and chain and should let him go out every time. it is the age old guilt trip. too bad for him - don't hold on to his issues about demonizing you. he should learn how to conversate in a more progressive way that shows you want the best for each other. (as you can see -- i have been through these types of discussions with the bro as well) isn’t this what is called talking to one another? the words we choose are important, but usually we don’t have time to think deeply about them. but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t reflect on past discussions and then change future ones.

i find myself telling my husband when i am going to the bathroom and he makes fun of me for giving him such detailed information about my goings on, but sometimes it is important so we both know only one of us is around to “keep an eye” on the two year old. i think we should always notify each other of what is going on in a questioning way — not overtly asking for permission though, but also not telling the other what we are doing (both rude).

i think the donkey has unknowingly (or knowingly) concocted a method of making the wife feel like she is evil and should not be the ball and chain and should let him go out every time. it is the age old guilt trip. too bad for him – don’t hold on to his issues about demonizing you. he should learn how to conversate in a more progressive way that shows you want the best for each other. (as you can see — i have been through these types of discussions with the bro as well)

]]> By: Nancy http://www.wifeadvice.com/2008/02/wife-doesnt-want-husband-asking-for-permission-to-go-out-or-does-she/comment-page-1/#comment-1470 Nancy Tue, 12 Feb 2008 13:15:02 +0000 http://www.wifeadvice.com/2008/02/wife-doesnt-want-husband-asking-for-permission-to-go-out-or-does-she/#comment-1470 It's all about being considerate. Sure, he doesn't NEED the wife's permission, but those are his kids too that you are caring for TOGETHER. It's not asking permission - it's having a conversation about the family's plan. What the Donkey does affects the Wife and sometimes the kids - so it's polite to check first. It’s all about being considerate. Sure, he doesn’t NEED the wife’s permission, but those are his kids too that you are caring for TOGETHER. It’s not asking permission – it’s having a conversation about the family’s plan. What the Donkey does affects the Wife and sometimes the kids – so it’s polite to check first.

]]> By: Tsahi Levent-Levi http://www.wifeadvice.com/2008/02/wife-doesnt-want-husband-asking-for-permission-to-go-out-or-does-she/comment-page-1/#comment-1468 Tsahi Levent-Levi Tue, 12 Feb 2008 08:05:04 +0000 http://www.wifeadvice.com/2008/02/wife-doesnt-want-husband-asking-for-permission-to-go-out-or-does-she/#comment-1468 It's not just you. My wife is in that club as well. She hates being the gatekeeper, but somehow she gives me the feeling that I need to ask permission each time. As a donkey myself, I'd say that this time your donkey is quite correct in asking for permission. He might approach it a bit differently, but hell - it's the same - he still needs to ask for permission. This being the case, I suggest you simply decide each time if it suits you or not. We're at a point in our own marriage where if one of us simply says yes or no it 'should' be enough (mostly that is) It’s not just you. My wife is in that club as well.
She hates being the gatekeeper, but somehow she gives me the feeling that I need to ask permission each time.
As a donkey myself, I’d say that this time your donkey is quite correct in asking for permission. He might approach it a bit differently, but hell – it’s the same – he still needs to ask for permission.
This being the case, I suggest you simply decide each time if it suits you or not. We’re at a point in our own marriage where if one of us simply says yes or no it ’should’ be enough (mostly that is)

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